The Breeze

I get this feeling.

Every time the cold breeze blows on my skin.

It's the only nostalgia that feels good to me.

It blows through me and lifts me back to lovely moments in my life. Times that I didn't know were important until the breeze blew them back.

I think of the first time I took the Greenpoint Ferry. The wind blowing. Me watching the waves form around the boat. I never knew you could take a boat ride for the cost of a train ride. I never wanted it to end. And it ended too soon.

I think of first time I rode in a convertible. I believe we were going from the lower east side to the Met via FDR. It was with my classmates for that wonderful Gallatin class. Sigmund Freud's Great grandson was driving. I tried to smoke but the wind was too strong, so I just enjoyed the ride while it lasted. Another one that ended too soon.

I think of falling asleep in the park when my dad came to visit in New York.

Nedra, Aliya, he, and I went to see The Daily Show in Hell's Kitchen. We relaxed in the park quietly after the show. I put a jacket on my head and drifted off, knowing I was safe surrounded by family.

The first time I ever went on a girl scout trip. I'd never slept in the wilderness before Camp White Pines. I loved thick hoodies as a kid, because I could feel the cold air on my face, but the warmth of my clothing comforted me and assured me I could enjoy nature without getting too cold. Like armor.

The days when I had just started school at Decatur. I was single digits. I was learning what it felt like to be in the world. I would have a half day of school every few weeks. Mom would come to pick me up.

And when the weather was perfectly chilled, fall in the Windy City– as crisp as ever, she would take me to Corner Bakery or the Cheesecake Factory for lunch.

I wasn't always happy, but I was happy on those days.

And I think it was more than getting out of school early.

More than the play dates and special treats.

More evidence in the memories I don't have time to add.

It was the breeze.

It's Hard to Keep Up a Zine!

I would never identify as "an artist" because the idea of saying that makes me want to leap from a window. However, I am a person who enjoys making art and expressing myself through creativity. Still, the second I start a project which demands I work in a timely fashion, I can barely get it together.

I talked about making a zine for my photography for years, then when I finally it, I printed two issues and went on hiatus almost immediately. What a shame. What a disservice I feel I have done to myself.

It's easy to blame the state of the world for a lack of action. I can't pretend it's not a contributing factor. Not just for me, but for all creatives. But some people are motivated by a drive to discuss their understanding of their place in the world, while others (like myself) are bogged down by the self-induced (and self-indulgent) pressure of actually doing a good job expressing ourselves.

It's something I'm working on circumventing this year. I didn't feel like writing a new blog post, but I forced myself to sit and write this... And I'm glad I did so!

I've included a film photo I took a few years ago when I finally decided to try out an idea I'd had for a long time.

I wish the best for all others who suffer from the same road blocks. If you're reading this and you have an idea, start working on it today. Committing to an idea is the difference between us and the people whose "success" or creativity we admire/envy.

Recent Rabbit Holes 2

5/18/25 - Vintage Label Makers.

Most people are charmed by embossed labels. Those are the kind that don't require ink or even batteries to create. Old school, stylized, tactile, and classically smart engineering.

A few years ago, I bought a contemporary Dymo Embossing Label Maker. Mind you, Dymo essentially invented the label maker. So I bought one from them in like 2021 for $10. It broke about a year or two later. In 2024, I decided I missed having one, so I bought another one. By then, the price had been raised to something like $15.

That label maker broke in less than 3 months.

At this point, I'm pissed because it feels like In 2025, we can literally do anything, but somehow we can't just have nice, quality items. Everything is made like shite now. How did the brand who invented label makers sell me a label maker that brought practically overnight? How is there no embossing label maker manufactured in 2025 that isn't made from the world's cheapest plastic? I find it upsetting as fuck and view it as a disturbing reflection of the extent to which people have to go out of their way or break the bank to have nice things that are made to last. We are somehow on the brink of entering an era in which it is countercultural to take the time necessary and do the research needed to acquire items that won't break after 4 uses.

So anyway, this all led me down the rabbit hole of looking for vintage embossing label makers that would not break immediately. I came across these two incredible models, both produced before the 80s boom of plastic products. The Scotch EA-400 (to the right) was made in May of 1979. The Dymo 1570 (to the left) was produced between the 60s and 70s, but I have not learned the production year of mine yet. Both have separately been called the "Cadillac[s] of Label Makers" by contemporary users. Doing my research, there is an insane number of not just Dymo label maker models, but vintage label makers in general. Most are beautifully constructed with creative almost futuristic or sci-fi like mid-century modern designs. The two I have look like guns from Star Trek or something (I've never seen Star Trek).

While I'm appreciative that I was able to procure two awesome label makers that will probably outlive me and be passed down to my grandkids, I can't help but– as a result of acquiring these– deeply long for a time that I never lived in. I can't help but desire to live in a world where craftsmanship and experimentation could coincide to become greater than capitalism itself...And maybe it wasn't greater. Maybe they believed at the time that craftsmanship would only fuel capitalism. But we no longer live in a time where even that is viable.

There was a time when people who lived in poverty had clothes that they could wear for decades without buying new ones because the ones they had were so well made or at least well-mended and worth mending. Today, people buy shirts online that arrive smelling like formaldehyde and turn to dust after one machine wash. It's the best new clothes that some people can afford. Hence why I pretty much only thrift or buy everything (including these label makers) from eBay.

It all simply leaves me wishing that we– the middle and lower class public, could easy have access to nice, well-made things. This is not a new feeling to me, but goddamn did the randomly and astonishingly exceptional quality of two simple label makers make me wish to time travel.